Friday, June 22, 2012

Buffalohair Walking and Diabetes

Walking and Diabetes

I am a believer in early morning power walks and I’m living proof a person can beat diabetes, lower blood pressure and actually have something nice to say when confronted by humans. I used to run but now I try to knock off 4 miles in 50 minutes or so. I know there are people who can run circles around me and I don’t care. Sometimes I’ll mix a few half mile jaunts into my routine but walking is mostly what me and my PF Flyers like to do.

The mechanics of my early morning stroll is really quite simple. Get up way to early, 4 am. Meet my walking chum at a desolate turn-about in the woods at 4:30 am. Then we walk at an extreme pace, almost a run, but not quite. I mean, we are ‘strutt’n it’ down this dirt road for exactly 2 miles. We stop, I take a piss then we head 2 miles back up the hill where we parked our cars. The challenge is to maintain the pace we kept when we were coming down the trail. Ain’t no big deal, it does not require rocket science and you can wear spandex if you really wanted to.

As for us, its sweats and Nikes plus a few big caliber guns, just in case bears or big kitties try to add us to their menu. Bears and big cats do eat people here and I have little desire to experience a culinary adventure as an entrée. The trick is to continue walking long after you’ve convinced yourself you don’t need to walk anymore. After you make it over the hump (about two weeks) you’ll walk rain or shine like clock work and even feel guilty when you can’t go anywhere because a blizzard closed all the roads. 

The kewl part of getting up so early is the fact we are in the cool of the day and everywhere smells ‘green’. Plants fill the air with their crisp and sweet earthen fragrances and it totally rocks. We run next to a stream and follow it to the next tributary and down to the lake where we run along the shore to our 1/2 way point. The sun is not even on the horizon and on a full moon its way bitchen out there. Ducks and geese greet us every morning as they forage for breakfast. As spring turns into summer the deer and elk are coming out in force. We found bear crappola along our trail, a big turd to. Easy math, big turd equals big bear and from what we’ve gathered it’s a daddy bear that stands at about 9 feet tall according to marks on the trees. The walk is very healthy, refreshing and exhilarating provided you are not eaten.

By the time 5:35 am rolls around I’m having my first cup of java back in my mountain chalet (shack) and getting ready to dance with the body bag. I might as well work on those body shots and left hook eh. After all; ‘If you ever have to defend yourself with your hands it’s nice to send the aggressor to bed early’, I always say. Screw that dancing around routine, I’m too old for all that dramatic stuff. In my elderly state I prefer to jump in and take care of business when I think someone might do harm to my frail self. Just deliver a few quick lethal cabeza and body shots then call an ambulance before they bleed all over my gladiolas. Hmm, maybe I should check my sugar. One thing you can safely bank on is the fact the world is a much more violent place and its destine to get much worse. Having the ability to jog a few miles away from danger at any given time would be a survival skill indeed.

And here is the coolest part of this story. My walking chum used to be diabetic and had to take insulin several times a day along with pills. But after we started our walks his sugar came down and eventually he no longer needed shots or pills to stabilize his sugar levels or blood pressure. We also maintain a quality nutritious diet and eat lots of dead plants & cactus. Did you know that Nopales or Prickly Pear Cactus is a hedge against diabetes? It grows wild all over the Southwest and it does not require a prescription. I experienced something similar when I had diabetes only thing was I ate walrus blubber and a bunch of other tribal foods during one of my global odysseys. I was running around the woods and eating traditional foods & bushes back then. So it could have been anything or a combination of all of the above for all I know. One thing is for sure, I’m no longer diabetic. 

Now, I don’t have daily access to whale, walrus, seals and other culinary dishes I once imbibed in. But I stay physical, eat real food and steer clear of Triglyceride Burgers and Trans Fatty Fries. Once in a while I will eat at Carl’s with my mom, she likes Carl’s. I can’t get her to eat squid or octopus let alone a durian or tea leaf salad but she will tear up some buffalo or elk with no hesitation. At 85 yrs of age I doubt she would join me on my morning constitutionals but she is a hoot with a couple Singapore Slings in her gullet when I take her to ‘the lounge’ on special occasions. And what does getting my 85 yr old mom sauced have to do with diabetes, nothing but she is a lot of fun.

I can’t guarantee if you stopped taking your meds do more physical activity and eat good foods you will cure your diabetes. But I can guarantee you that it would not hurt if you tried in earnest to get more physical and quit eating out of the corporate dumpster. I’ve seen many people turn their diabetes around by doing these simple things, no CD’s, pills, or books, just exercise and paying attention to what you stuff in your pie hole. Granted not everyone was completely cured but everyone did get a better handle on their disease by making their condition easier to manage. Even now I find myself looking at contents and balancing my intake even though my sugar is good. With the proper amount of physical activity alone there are many conditions we can alleviate ourselves of by simply moving and breaking a sweat.

And if by chance this is the time of change you had better be able to move your butter ball butt down the road if needed. What about all that survival stuff you bought? Will you be able to lug that junk around without dying of a heart attack? A tornado will sweep down and carry your lard ass to Kansas if you are not careful. I am no track star and you don’t need to stroll 4 miles a day while beating the daylights out of a body bag to be in fit condition but you need to do something physical as a routine and that’s the bottom line. If you prefer to sit on your keister diabetes is only one of many conditions that will plague you to an early grave.

Worse yet, you might evolve to look like one of those pencil neck technology dependant sissies from space with a giant head and bony arms and legs. And I can’t help but wonder; what do alien chicks look like? Now that’s a dramatic ending eh.

Your Devil’s Advocate

© 2012, Buffalohair Productions. All rights reserved.
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